SOME THINGS ARE PRICELESS

SOME THINGS ARE PRICELESS

By

Harold J. McLaughlin, Ph.D.

Some things in life you just can?t put a price on, such as watching the birth of a new life coming into the world, the smile of one?s mate in appreciation for something you?ve done, watching children smile as they open birthday or Christmas presents, or just snuggling up with a loved one in front of a fireplace with a blazing fire on a cold winters night.

I recently had such an experience. It was on a Thursday night, two days away from Father?s Day on Sunday. No it wasn?t my grown son who called but my grandson, Austin. He had to call his, ?Popsy-Bo-Bopsy,? his latest name for me, on an urgent matter. The next morning his Kindergarten class was having a father?s day celebration with handmade gifts for the fathers, a class poem presentation, and donuts, juice and chocolate milk for refreshments. Austin?s father could not get off work to attend but grandfathers, brothers or uncles were also welcome to stand in for the absent fathers. Just to make sure no child would be disappointed, mothers too were welcome if a male representative could not attend. Austin?s teacher thought of everything.

Austin loves and idolizes his father, Jim and Jim in turn loves Austin just as much and the two of them do many things together. Jim and Austin have built a play- house together, play basketball, catch, golf and even go roller blading together. Jim also has the ?patience of Jobe? when it comes to assembling Austin?s ?zillion? part Lego toys that require adult assembly help. When Jim relaxes from his heavy work schedule in the garage on his favorite chair, smoking his pipe (he can?t do that indoors) Austin is right there with him. Jim has drawn a scale model of an aircraft carrier on the garage floor so Austin can play pretend ?ships? while Jim enjoys his pipe ? and Austin plays pretend ?ships.?

Jim was very disappointed not being able to attend this very important occasion in his son?s life. Popsy-Bo-Bopsy would make a suitable substitute in this case but in no way could he replace his father. Actually it was my wife, Bev who took his call. A good thing too because Popsy-Bo-Bopsy is hard of hearing, especially when it comes to children?s high pitched voices that are out of his hearing range.

Bev asked me if I would go to his very important event. Austin lives in San Diego and Bev and I live in the Palm Springs, California area, which is a two hour and 15 minute drive to Austin?s house; plus the same amount of return time. This being our only grandchild, how could we say no? He was overjoyed that he would have someone in his classroom the next day.

Bev and I got up at 5:00 AM the next morning, showered and dressed and we were off at 6:00 AM. We arrived at 8:15 AM, a full thirty-five minutes before Austin and I had to leave for his school. When it was time to leave, a neighbor father and his two boys joined us for the several block walk to school. Austin proudly held my hand as we set out for the walk, happy that his ?Popsy-Bo-Bopsy? was there with him. However, he soon tired of this as he and his friends bounded ahead of the father and I, playing some sort of a child?s game while pulling their wheeled book back packs behind them.

When we arrived at the school, his friends and father separated from us as they went to a different classroom. Austin once again, but this time with authority, took my hand and proudly led me to his classroom. Upon arrival, Austin and two other boys ?roughhoused? together while I sat on some steps talking with other fathers, much younger than I.

Finally it was time and the teacher greeted her students and parents and other adult representatives, and welcomed them to her classroom. She has a ritual she performs whenever anyone enters her classroom. She gives each one a squirt of a liquid disinfectant on their hands to help prevent hand borne germs that can cause illness. That teacher thinks of everything.

Once in the classroom, Austin led me to his table and invited me to sit in one the miniature chairs that can only be comfortable to a five or six year old, but not for a 5 foot, 91/2 inch, 245 pound adult. But sit I did. I joked to a father sitting behind me, ?Now let?s see you get up!?

On Austin?s table lay a hand crafted paper necktie, inscribed with a ?Happy Father?s Day? statement written only as a six year old can write it. Austin very proudly said, ?I made it for my father.? I praised him for his effort and told him his uncle Michael made one something like it for me many years ago and each year we hang it proudly on our Christmas tree as an ornament. Treasures such as that are meant to keep for a lifetime.

Austin also showed me another gift he made for his father, carefully wrapped in white paper with a ribbon around it. Inside was a picture frame made from Popsicle sticks. He cautioned me not to open it because it is for his father. I assured him that I wouldn?t touch it as I know he made it for his father.

The teacher called the class to order and invited all the children to the front of the room to jointly recite their poem, with one line having them all jump together in glee about us being there and the final line with their arms outstretched for a hug to all of us. Now that was heartwarming! Heartwarming enough to make a tear form in the corner of a father?s eye, with the father?s of course, hoping no one would notice.

Following their presentation, the children and their fathers (or mothers) lined up for their share of the Crispy Cream donuts, orange juice or chocolate milk, the latter made by pouring a bit of chocolate in a Styrofoam cup, adding milk then stirring until it the chocolate dissolved into the milk. The teacher greeted each parent at they reached the head of the line. I told her about Austin?s emergency call and our trip to San Diego. She thanked me for coming.

Once seated, and everyone was munching on their delicious Crispy Cream donuts, the teacher addressed the class and thanked everyone for coming, fathers, brothers, uncles, mothers and even one grandfather. She also told everyone about how the one grandfather happened to be there, how Austin made the call and the early morning drive to San Diego. Austin was visibly pleased.

When everyone had eaten, and some of the mother helpers were disposing of the dirty paper plates and Styrofoam cups, the teacher asked all of the children to gather in front of the room and sit on the floor in preparation for a presentation by one of the fathers. He is a stockbroker by day but on weekends he is a racecar driver. He brought along a racing seat and racing seat belts and helmet for his demonstration. He kept his presentation simple and directed it towards safety and how the children should also practice safety anytime they are in a car, on their bicycle, skateboard, scooter or anything else with wheels. He demonstrated his equipment and had one girl sit in the racing seat and positioned the seat belts around her. He had another girl put on the helmet. His talk and demonstrations held the interest of the children through to the end. He also invited questions from the children and the adults who remained for his presentation. He may be a stockbroker but he really knows how to relate to children and to answer their questions in away they can understand.

The big event in Austin?s life ?in an hour it was over ?but he was happy! Was it worth it for Popsy-Bo-Bopsy? You bet it was!

The day was not over yet. Since it was a beautiful sunny day, Bev, Jackie and I drove to nearby La Jolla Shores and parked our car in the Marine Room restaurant parking lot. The restaurant is right on the beach and about a mile of shoreline from the La Jolla Shores Beach wharf. Since we were an hour early for lunch we walked the sandy beach to the wharf and back, taking in the beach activities. Mothers were walking their children in the sand; children and adults were playing in the somewhat chilly ocean water; life guards patrolling the beach in their jeep surveying the water for swimmers in trouble; young people playing volleyball on the sandy beach; scuba divers putting on their wet suits and diving gear; sunbathers lying on the beach; and sea gulls flying about looking for their next meal.

When we returned to the restaurant we were able to get a table facing the ocean so we could continue watching the beach activities while we had a delicious and leisurely lunch. The best part of that was my daughter treated my wife and I as a father?s day gift for me. She didn?t forget her dad!

It?s interesting that as we grow older how some of the seemingly smallest things provide the greatest pleasures and value in life. When Bev and I were young parents I didn?t have the time to enjoy these small pleasures in life. Like so many fathers and now many working mothers have to forego taking time to do these fun things with their families. I know I was too busy just trying to make a living. I was totally unbalanced, devoting much to much time to my work, spending too much time away from the family. Fortunately, Bev was a stay at home mom and had the child rearing responsibilities along with all the tears and the joys of watching them grow from one stage to another.

Early that afternoon Bev and I started our journey back to Palm Springs. As we drove through the mountains, blessed with clear sky?s and a setting sun, we reflected back on the day?s events. Yes! Some things in life are indeed priceless.